How the mind works

Do you listen to the voice in your head? Maybe you shouldn’t. The problem is that most people only listen to the voice in their head not realizing what that voice is designed to do. It is designed for obe thing and one thing only, to keep you safe. The problem is how the mind defines the concept of safe.

Sure it is really important to be safe but the mind is acting like an over protective mother, always worried about what’s going to happen. It is always worry about what you’re going to do.

Want an example? Walk down the street, see some random stranger in say hi. I’m willing to bet that the vast majority of you immediately balked at doing this. That resistance, that little voice that said “but hi don’t know them.”, “they could hurt me”….that’s the voice that keeps you from ever getting on in your life. That’s the voice that keeps you safe.

Safe does NOT let you grow. As a person, as a soul, you ONLY ever grow at the edge of your comfort zone. No one had ever become a better person by watch TV, or by reading a book. They did it by getting out of their comfort zone and DID something. Maybe they gathered up the courage to ask that boy out for a date. Maybe they finally decided to ask their boss for a raise. Our, like a few I have met here, they finally got the courage to take steps to get out of a relationship that no longer served their higher good.

Hers another little trick to help. Your feelings are mainly an indication of your thoughts. When you are afraid, you notice that all your thoughts are of fear. Your emotions don’t dictate your feelings, it’s the other way around. Since we humans can’t possibly monitor the thousands of thoughts in our heads, we have our emotions that act like a gauge to give us an idea of what we are thinking in our minds.

I’m going to give you the key to your life right now.

“Change your thoughts and your life will change.”

I have recently set my mind on a course. All my thoughts are in that direction. Does that mean i don’t have doubts and fear? Absolutely not. I have then all the time. I just choose to ignore them and follow my soul, regardless of what my mind tells me.

This is why I will never be able to explain my actions to nearly everyone I know. Because they are not enlightened enough to understand. They still think that their mind is the only thing that matters. To them I will say “This is my choice. Accept it.”

So, what is your mind telling you right now? Is it telling you that you can’t move on? That it’s too hard? That too many people will get hurt? Or is that just all bullshit?


The highest good

How many of you have sacrificed your spiritual growth under the banner of “I don’t want to hurt him/her”?  Were you making a True choice our were you too afraid of making a choice that was for your higher good?  Do not confuse this with “the greater good”.  That just means for humanity at large.  The “higher good” is for your own growth and not that of others, it is personal.

My own mother sacrificed so much for what she trained herself to believe was for the good of the family.  Mostly because of some irrational fear and immaturity on the part of my father. To this day, she does not have any friends she goes out to see.  No one calls her just to talk with her about life.  She had embedded everything she does with family only.  While that can be considered admirable, I want you to sit there and tell me that’s healthy for your soul.  Can you even conceive of not having anyone to talk to outside of your family? What does that teach your kids?  They say that your kids either grow up just like you our completely opposite.  In thus respect, I am completely opposite.  I have friends all over the world. Many who would do anything if I asked them.

My mother had sacrificed a good career just because of my father’s insecurity. This is something I refuse to do.  I will not let anyone stand in my way of my personal growth. This includes breaking relationships that are doing nothing but holding me back.  We all do this, yet for some reason if you say you at leaving your marriage, everyone wants to give you advice on how to keep it.  Well, everyone except those who don’t like your significant other that is.

This change is for my higher good. It is not rash. It is not even a sudden decision, although many will think so but only because they at not “in the loop” of events that have transpired. 7 years is a long time to carry around mistrust and resentment.  The mistrust stated off huge after the cheating was discovered but it eventually died down to a mild case of paranoia.  Hmmm, not really paranoid but just…..a low level of distrust.  The resentment has been growing in a near linear line.  I have had to control my outbursts in reaction to something my partner had done/said.  It’s greeting harder to do and if anything else, that is a sign in of itself things need to change.

I think I should apologize a little.

My original intent was for this blog to be my own little place to pontificate on singe of my philosophies of life. It seems I an venting as little more than pontificating, and for that I am sorry.

Am I really apologizing to you or to myself? That’s right….to myself. Regardless, it seems that the blog is evolving and so are my perspectives on life. I Hope that those reading week gain as little insight to relationships as well as other parts of life through both my deep thoughts and my emotional outbursts.

I want my fucking patience now!

Seriously. Had a lot of computer-things go wrong today. I finally got over that and the damned headache too. You kissed me on the cheek goodnight, I put headphones on so I can watch a TV on my computer and you’ve been back 3 fucking times with the first 6 minutes!

I’m going to guess that the effort it is taking me not to snap is because of everything that came at me today and not just your one stupid, weak ability to be able to do simple things AFTER you said good night.

I really hope I can work through the next few months. I don’t really want to make a rash decision. Its going to be annoying enough to retool you I’m taking a trip without you and the crap you are going to spew over that.

Going to need some heavy meditation tonight I think.

Biding your time

Have you ever been in a relationship where you knew it was going to end? There was no absolute time/date set, you just knew it would happen. How do you deal with such a thing? Do you radiate malice to its end? Our how about just hostility to the other? What if there was no reason for it ending other than you just need a change? The other person is not necessarily a bad person, they just don’t seem to suit you any more.

How do you let them know? Do you really try to work it out but deep down you know they aren’t going to change and all the things, little and big, have finally added up to something that you really don’t want to work with at all.

Should you just one say, pack up while they were out and leave a note? Is that really cowardly? Or simply the cleanest way to break the tie.

Does the other even deserve anything more than a goodbye note?

None of theses question can even be answered by any of you. There is more to any given situation than outsiders really know and the only answer that matters is the one I give it.


What do you know of distraction? Can you even recognize it when it is right in front of you? Even if you do, do you change anything to make it have meaning in your life?

Do not be confused about the difference between distraction and recreation. That line is all too often blurred and warped into “it is my break time” poor excuse. This applies to all realty shows, soap operas and game shows. They contribute nothing to the betterment of mankind and serve only to keep you dumb.

If it doesn’t improve your life, it is a distraction from the truth. If you are reading my blog solely because you are bored, then don’t bother. If you are reading my blog because you want to consider life and different points of view, you are more than welcomed here.

Do you go on…and damn I hate even typing this, Facebook to read other peoples updates? Please explain to me how that improves your life? Same goes for any other “social media”. Better yet, lets broaden that out to “any media”.

We definitely need to be able to re-create ourselves every now and then, no questions there. It is when you blur the line from true recreation to plain old being lazy. Distracted from truly improving your life.

If you are not actively trying to improve your life, you have no place in mine.

All things aside, that is the key reason my current relationship is on its way out. The real kicker is when I point out how they could help themselves, it gets blatantly ignored. I don’t do ignorance. I don’t do lazy.

When I find someone who gets that, I’m ecstatic. I’ve found some here on WordPress. Just about all the ones I did were in a nearly identical situation as I am now. Theses are the ones who are no longer distracted and are much more awake than most. For that, I honor them and their awareness. You know who you are.

Shit is about to get real

You know that feeling you get when you are about to kiss someone for the first time? Or how about when you come home, late and you just know your parents are going to yell at you?  That nervous feeling or “butterflies” in your stomach.  Yeah, that feeling.

I have been doing done serious soul searching and making plans for a massive change in life. I’ve been discussing it with someone close to me and mostly glossed over specific details by only going on instinct.  At some point that instinct had to turn into action.  It has come from the spiritual level, into the mental level.  That has been where I’ve been for a few months now.  Today I have noted a subtle shift in my emotions.  That process where the butterflies are manifesting themselves into the real world.  Serious plans have to be given real thoughts.  Actions be made real.  This is a shift and that nervousness is a sign of it emerging.

I kinda want to typically say “As long as I can manage it, I’ll be ok.” but that would be wrong.  I know I will get through this and be ok.  Its not prescient knowledge….or rather maybe it is.  I have no plans to die, and I certainly won’t be giving up on my choices.  It is going to be an interesting ride.  You don’t want to miss it.

Soul Mates?

Do you believe in them?  Sure the idea in bandied about in stories and movies but how many of you actually believe in them?  I’m willing to bet you believe more in the idea than the actual possibility.

The idea kinda goes like this:

Two people, born at some significant distance (either physical or social) and when they meet, they feel like they were made for each other.

Sounds like a typical Hollywood trope right?  One thing about Hollywood, they do exaggerate ideas and stories well beyond their original intent/actual instance .

I believed in the concept as well.  I mean, there is always something useful in the idea of hoping that such a thing existed. Indeed, since man cannot create something s/he has never experienced, there would seen to be an indication that there is some level of truth to this concept.

So, what are the odds of you finding someone who who truly your compliment?  You could say 1 in 7 Billion but that would mean you swing both ways sexually.  So lets seed if we can cut that down.  Giving a roughly even population of men/women, you are down to 1 in 14  Billion.

“wait, shouldn’t that number go down?”  I originally thought so to but considering that cutting out half the population means you have to work twice as hard to find that exact person seems to make more sense because they are not likely sitting right next to you.

We can probably pair that down further into an age group because some 90 year old woman isn’t going to fall madly in love with a 2 year old boy.  So what do you think….30% of the population is within a reasonable age-appropriate striking range? (you might want consider the unwritten rule on 1/2+7 for age that is socially acceptable).   So where does that leave us?

14 billion * 1.3 = 18.2 Billion (yeesh … Those odds are starring to get worse than a lotto…).

So now what?  We could factor in the time it would take you to search the world and hope the soul-mate doesn’t die of old age before you find then.  I’ll keep it simple and just double the odds.

1 in 36.4 Billion*.

Hey you know, I bet if you played the Lotto and win, your “soul mate” would just show up!

*note: 78.5% of all numbers are made up on the spot.

Ok, let me give you the real odds now.  50/50.  Either it will happen or it won’t.

I will also say this:  I found mine.  The circumstance around it are complicated and would be seen as truly bizarre if you looked at it from a certain point of view.  Hell, even my mind still had a hard time with it but if you went back to my post on levels, the situation make absolutely perfect sense on a spiritual level.

What does it feel like to know a soul-mate?  Not what Hollywood says. The feeling is different, deeper, much more profound.  Sure there are emotions but if you are aware enough on how life works, and both mature and wise enough, the full meaning of it defies logic or reason. It gets into the realm of the esoteric and that simply cannot be defined.

I think the Oracle from the Matrix put it best though.

Being the One is like being in love. No one can tell you are in love, you just know you’re in love. Through and through.  Balls to bone.

Just swap out “love” with “with your soul mate”.

This is not a one sided equation.  This only works when it is reciprocated by the other person.  That is the kicker.

Now this thing about odds….utter bullshit.  The saying “when the student is ready, the master will appear.” applies to finding your soul-mate and you cannot put odds on something like that.  The only thing you can do is to learn about how life works, and how you can apply it to yourself.  You do this and a massive world of possibilities come rushing in.  You just be damn ready to handle the in-rush of positive stress and do NOT let your old, negative bullshit keep you from growing!

Letters to Strangers

I generally won’t reblog content. Not because I’m selfish but because the purpose of this blog is to express my own ideas. Yet I am moved by the beauty and underlying deepness of this person’s act. I plan on doing the same and follow this beautiful soul’s example. I would like to suggest the same to you.

Digital Confessions

I type my digital confessions
On a canvass of liquid crystals
With plastic coated characters
They are not for you
They are for me
Words that long to be said
Truths that no one wants to hear
Watch your media
Check your books and birds
Ignore what happens around you
That is what they want
Your time is finite
Yet you waste it
With words of cat
Pics of dumb people
Fake news
And all the while
Real Truths go unnoticed
The Rapture has already happened
You missed the boat
Like you will be the point of this
Copyright 2014