How many of you have it? What is your limit?
Being the person I am, I like to dive right in and get things done. I see something i like, I go for it, all out. If it is of real importance then I have no limits.
Yet when it comes to relationships, there is a certain undefined limit. That would be the human factor. You can only go as fast as the other person is comfortable with. Oh you could try to force the issue but that will generally end up bad. The other person will usually resent you because they would feel they were forced into a decision they weren’t ready for. Yet how would you cope if sometime was paralyzed with fear?
There is a line from Tea Party’s song Temptation that says “We exist in a world where the fear of illusion is real.”. The future is an illusion. It simply does not exist. Indeed, one of the best definitions of fear is “the anticipation of pain.”. Again with the future that has not happened yet and there is no guarantee that this “pain” will exist ever. If it does, it is never as bad as the illusion your mind created.
Sure it sounds all romantic to say “If you truly love them, then you will wait.” The problem with that is it panders to peoples fears. There are few who can truly plan out life changing actions and execute them with ease.
I know there is no real answer to be found here. Every scenario is different. Every person is different. This post is part vent, part getting my ideas out to make people think.
I suppose the best thing to do is simple keep nudging, encouraging and occasional give a nice big shove without going all strongarm on the other person.