I don’t get how this happens. I was on a long public transportation ride back to my city, petty relaxing, a few annoyances with my electronics mis-behaving but otherwise a normal thing. Some work has piled up and suddenly I need a bunch of stuff done but can’t possibly get them all done as I am only one person. I get home but just prior, had this growing feeling of….’don’t want to be here’ type of deal. I don’t get why I suddenly felt annoyed. Sure, I needed some food and when I’m really hungry, I get irritable but this did not feel like that. I ate, and suddenly my significant other had a ton of things that just needed to be droned on about. Way more details that were completely irrelevant and I didn’t need to hear. Just get to the point so I can get on with my work will you?!
I was away for a day, sure it was for work and sure it was pretty demanding but it wasn’t something that should have set off this feeling of frustration. I know we are moving and it’s not a small move either. Yet could it really be that insidious as to start causing stress at such a subtle level? I’m usually quite self-aware of the origins of my feelings/thoughts but sometimes….I just get blind-sided. I tend to want to think that it’s related to one of my close friends that I have an ‘etheric’ type of bond with. That would be a more ‘rational’ explanation in that the feelings are coming from a close friend rather than truly of my own origin. It’s not really that unheard of in society but the more ‘scientific’ types put such things down despite there being more than just a random case of this type of thing.
So what do I do? Try to contain my words, not terribly successfully, and write out a blog post.
This next geographical move of mine is a big one. Necessary as a step towards an even bigger move, which I KNOW there will be stress involved, but still necessary.
Let’s see if I can work off this frustration in some work now shall we?