Ha, bet I’m the first one to write that as a subject line! (Work with me here, I think I’m clever).
So, I need to update the recent Stress post.
After doing some internal searching, I finally decided that it wasn’t _my_ stress. It was external. No I’m not blaming it on someone else, and no I’m not alluding to barometric pressure changes. I mean I was connected with someone and feeling their stress sympathetically! So, I fired off a few messages to see which one of the people I felt closest to and bingo, hit a response! The other person first said it was a rather random question that I was asking but yes, they were indeed feeling extremely frustrated at that very moment. Would you be surprised it was that person I met who pleaded me not to leave after only meeting them 4 weeks ago? It’s rather interesting to see how I can find people, make significant connections with them and how long they can last, not to mention how strong they can be too.
I even had a dream about that person. As far as I can remember, I rarely have dreams about people I know. Lately, due to some upcoming significant changes in my residence, I’ve been dreaming about family and friends. Pretty detailed stuff. I told that other person that they were in my dreams, even described it fairly detailed but leaving out some of the intimate feelings that were evoked within said dream.
As this other person and I have kept in casual contact, sending jokes or quick chats back and forth, I mentioned that I had done a bit of early research into renting back in the town where I stayed for awhile. We talked a bit about details and what type of place I was looking for/price range, that sort of stuff. Then I was asked if I would share a place with them. I was a little stunned but would obviously be perfectly fine with it. I played it cool and well…looks like I have one less consideration to have to go through should I move that way. Of course, there would be other conversations that would have to be involved. Out of all the things I have learned, dealing with conflict is a pretty important one. If you have no agreed upon rule, then emotions will utterly take over and ruin something over a trivial misunderstanding. What a waste that would be for all involved.
Still, there will be time yet. Got so much more to finish off before that can be given real thought and not just some casual due diligence investigation. In regards to my current status, I am thinking of approaching it with a ‘one year separation’. Every time I have had real freedom, I keep learning more about myself. The more I learn, the more I feel I become unhindered. The more I am able to express myself and my true inner-being. Between having weekends to myself, away from home, to being in another country for more than just a few weeks, it’s like I’m learning to fly in steps. The next step will be my first taste of true freedom and I doubt I’ll ever turn back. Yet in order to make this as easy as possible, I need to play it for what it is. All about me.
Wow….I am still kind of feeling the impact of this offer. Seriously, it feels like a major point in my life. Already my brain is working a few stories and what could happen, my imagination takes on a life of it’s own and it’s insanely exciting! As long as I can keep directing this energy into moving forward intelligently, I’ll be tripping all through the rest of the year!
* Another update….(this is starting to get weird….an update to an update and an update??)
It’s been 18hrs, had some sleep and I’m still in that ‘I can barely believe this is happening’ feeling. It’s one of those things that you know is exactly on track to a greater you. As long as I can guide thing upward spiral, not necessarily control but at least just guide it, I’ll be doing good.